Eight months ago I joined a sisterhood that I never wanted to join and the initiation is the worst process ever. Your heart is torn in pieces. Everything you thought you knew has changed. Every dream you had for the future was instantly crushed. And the worst part of it, it's involuntary and you are in it for life!
Since I've become a widow, I've witness 2 more women join the club. But the most recent inductee, was by far the most devistating for me. My younger cousin, lost her husband suddenly. Three boys under five. They had just made plans to move. And in the blink of an eye the world came tumbling down.
I thought I'd know what to say! I thought I'd know what to do! Our situations were so similar. Her heartache was so memorable, but nothing seemed right or appropriate.
I wished I could take away her pain.
I wish she would never have to have that conversation with her sweet boys.
I wish I could tell her that this was the worst part of the pain.
I wish this never happened.
In that moment my anger with God returned.
Why would he put another mother through this?
Lani asked the same question and I had no answer... "Mommy, why would God take their daddy too?" And I had no answer to that question either.
You see normally when you join a club there are rules, charters or handbooks to help you find your way. But that's not the case here. We just learn day by day and try to support each other along the way.