2 weeks ago today at 5:52 my phone rang with the call i'd been dreading since 4:44 that morning. i woke up on a the cruise ship somewhere in Louisiana to a group of text messages. None of them from Sean. I tried to call him but no answer..... i text no answer.... thats odd... but i went back to sleep... i woke up again and called again still no answer... i continued to call and text until 10:00 am, when i told Gin that something was wrong. There was no way it was this late and Sean hadn't answered....
Instead of hanging around New Orleans for the day we would hit the road immediately. At noon i started calling and texting his family and friends. No one had heard from him since Monday. Panic set in. His best friend Shawn called at 12:30 and said not to panic but "Sean was a no call, no show for work for two days." My heart sank.... the man who worked through the flu, would never miss two days without calling... i called his mom and sister back. we pulled over at a Mc Donalds in some small town and i broke down in the car as Gin took Lani inside to grab food... His sister told me to pray but i knew in my heart that this was not going to end well.
I begin to pray that he collapsed, maybe he would be hospitalized, anything but dead...
His mom called 911 and they did a well fare check... "everything looks fine"
i logged into the alarm system from my phone and saw it hadn't been disarmed since it was set monday night before bed.... i called and text my neighbor... they went and checked and could see that our dog was still in the house....
i called 911 again, still in Louisiana... they transferred me to longview tx 911, who eventually connected me to Garland 911... She forwarded me to the police department... after making my way through levels of the police department, the police chief finally agreed to break down the door... I was told i would receive a call in 30 minutes... at 5:52 the phone rang and everything changed
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Wednesday, July 30, 2014
Just Like That...
The phone call no wife ever wants to hear....
"Hello Mrs. Harris, this is Lt. _______... Are you driving?"
"No"
"...I'm sorry Mrs. Harris, your husband is deceased."
Just like that my whole world came crashing down. He said more but I don't remember much....
Four hours away, somewhere in Louisiana, our 4 yo daughter in the back seat asking where is daddy and why cant she talk to him?
I called my next door neighbor, because clearly the police officer was wrong, but she said it was true.
The next call was his mom, a call I never expected to make. Not even sure what I told her...
... the next four hours seemed like an eternity...
We switched cars near my neighborhood, so my dad could take Lani to their house, and my mom and Gin could drive me home.
Pulling up, there were so many cop cars, but the Coroner's van seemed to illuminate. It was as if the air was sucked out my lungs. Sean's best friend Shawn was standing in the front yard, when the medical examiner walked up to me and notified me again that my husband passed away. It seemed he had a heart attack...
I needed to see him... I needed to hold him... I needed him to know I was there...
(I.... I....I... I feel selfish writing all those I's)
But I couldn't do anything... All I could do was sign and allow them to take him. They put me in my mom's back seat and made me lay down.
He hated doctors and hospitals... He would be scared to go by himself (I had to hold his hand for a flu shot and TB test) ... I should be with him... He was already gone....
LANI... Oh God... I have to tell Lani....
How will she ever understand? What do i say? I asked Gin and she said to be specific and be sure to say died.
We got to my parent's house and I decided to tell her right away (we discussed telling her in the morning, but i couldn't keep telling her he was in a meeting. she was already suspicious of that)
We talked about who was her best friend (daddy) and how much daddy loved her, then that daddy died and went to heaven. She looked puzzled, then let out a scream. it was the worst pain ever, and there was nothing i could do to fix this. We talked about daddy for a while then she crawled into my lap and cried herself to sleep....
and just like that her whole life changed as well....
"Hello Mrs. Harris, this is Lt. _______... Are you driving?"
"No"
"...I'm sorry Mrs. Harris, your husband is deceased."
Just like that my whole world came crashing down. He said more but I don't remember much....
Four hours away, somewhere in Louisiana, our 4 yo daughter in the back seat asking where is daddy and why cant she talk to him?
I called my next door neighbor, because clearly the police officer was wrong, but she said it was true.
The next call was his mom, a call I never expected to make. Not even sure what I told her...
... the next four hours seemed like an eternity...
We switched cars near my neighborhood, so my dad could take Lani to their house, and my mom and Gin could drive me home.
Pulling up, there were so many cop cars, but the Coroner's van seemed to illuminate. It was as if the air was sucked out my lungs. Sean's best friend Shawn was standing in the front yard, when the medical examiner walked up to me and notified me again that my husband passed away. It seemed he had a heart attack...
I needed to see him... I needed to hold him... I needed him to know I was there...
(I.... I....I... I feel selfish writing all those I's)
But I couldn't do anything... All I could do was sign and allow them to take him. They put me in my mom's back seat and made me lay down.
He hated doctors and hospitals... He would be scared to go by himself (I had to hold his hand for a flu shot and TB test) ... I should be with him... He was already gone....
LANI... Oh God... I have to tell Lani....
How will she ever understand? What do i say? I asked Gin and she said to be specific and be sure to say died.
We got to my parent's house and I decided to tell her right away (we discussed telling her in the morning, but i couldn't keep telling her he was in a meeting. she was already suspicious of that)
We talked about who was her best friend (daddy) and how much daddy loved her, then that daddy died and went to heaven. She looked puzzled, then let out a scream. it was the worst pain ever, and there was nothing i could do to fix this. We talked about daddy for a while then she crawled into my lap and cried herself to sleep....
and just like that her whole life changed as well....
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